Cerebral Waves

 Aag tan-man mein lage, Radha kaise na jale? This aag is an evolved psychological trait, say evolutionary psychologists. Does that mean jealousy in the context of romantic relationships is just evolutionary conditioning, often playing in unconscious ways you can't do much about?  Does that also mean over evolutionary history, a greater and greater proportion of the human population started feeling jealous of their partner(s) intimately interacting with others from the opposite sex (let's keep homosexuality aside for now)? Under what selection pressures do you think the trait of jealousy would result in greater reproductive success?                                                         (Scene: Lagaan, Bollywood - 2001) It might have gone something like this:  (good chances that I'll make scientifically incorrect statements here)...

(Pasting my response to a question I got on a WhatsApp group: Why do many IIScian men chase women and once the woman is into them they are like " meh! I am not into u anymore"? It's so disheartening and emotionally so heavy on us women.) Although nothing justifies this behaviour, I think there's some explanation from evol-psycho as to why it's mostly men doing this, not women. And it's important to understand this -- just like it's important to understand criminal psychology.   Disclaimer: I am not a mate psychology expert. I just happen to be deeply interested in sex differences in humans. The interest developed with a desire to understand the typical behaviors of my sisters and women in general.  ( Maiden Mother Matriarch podcast: Diana Fleischman & Louise Perry on 'Uncanny Vulvas' (sex robots) and Sex Differences in our evolved psychology ) Just to remind u, our evolved psychology, at times, works in unconscious ways. U don’t ge...

Target audience: tentative DST INSPIRE fellows and aspirants of the same. I also made 2 videos on the topic: All about DST INSPIRE PhD fellowship Vinod's guide to DST INSPIRE PhD fellowship I am a 2nd year PhD scholar at the Centre for Neuroscience, IISc, Bengaluru.  I was an INSPIRE SHE scholar during my BSc at DU (2016-19) and MSc in Physics at IIT-G (2019-21). I was not an institute topper  but an inspire-SHE scholar with 60%+ in MSc. Hence, I could apply.  After my MSc, I had a gap of 2 years before I joined PhD.  You have to make a separate account on the INSPIRE portal for fellowship. Like, use a different email address than SHE one. If you are university gold medalist in MSc/MS, the procedure remains the same.  For people who apply for INSPIRE fellowship after getting enrolled in PhD, the procedure is slightly different. Their application directly jumps to level 2 evaluation, I assume. My Timeline:_________________ 2016-2021: INSPIRE SHE Scholar for 5 ye...

"...then life seems to be a long emergency", Sam Harris said on my screen sometime in last few months. And today I can almost 'feel' what he meant there.  (This is gonna be long, my Shiva. At this point I am not concerned what's useful for the reader and what's not. I am just gonna get it off my chest whichever way it gets expressed.) _________ 11th July 2022, evening ______ On terrace, I was trying to cover some stuff as part of my preparation for the upcoming exam after finally making myself comfortable in this new village, Rakhi, my mausi's sasural and my daada's nanihal. Sudden steps coming upstairs. It was Sunil, my mausera bhai. "Vinoda, come down. Immediately." And he ran downstairs. I thought there might be something exciting, some magic. Let's see what it is. But situation was more serious. Prahlad Kaka ( mausi's husband) and Mukesh (mausera bhai) were off to the farm. As I came downstairs, I saw my mausi (Santosh) lying alm...

Pasting from Quora. This list should never be complete and should be continually edited. _______ Gratitude is when you realize life is difficult and it seems like a long, unpredictable emergency, but despite that, there are people (around you) who care for you with zero expectations in return. There are people who don't think twice before helping you in need, though you are nearly a stranger to them at that moment.   I feel gratitude towards my maa, who has been sacrificing so much for me. Whatever sympathy/ empathy my character embodies has probably come from her.   I feel gratitude that my sisters want the best for me, almost over-protecting me sometimes.   I feel gratitude that I am alive, reasonably healthy, breathing air in this peaceful village, and have time and a mind to engage in my interests and hobbies.   I feel gratitude that people around me (and I) aren't crazy, angry, hateful, and deceitful most of the time. _/\_ VKJ)

(Pasting one of my Quora answers)   1. S/he thinks that s/he can get away with it with negligible consequences.   2. S/he is so short-sighted, being blind in sexual compulsion, that s/he isn't seeing the bigger picture of what s/he is doing. (It's often 'he'.)   A nonlinear combination of these two leads to an atrocity of rape or sexual harassment. Reason #2 is especially true in cases where one regrets one's act (minutes after the crime) when one faces society or realizes what devastating impact it had on the victim.   Looking back, I could see a part of me that might have been tempted to do something that can be called sexual harassment. But I decided to experiment with things with myself instead of messing with other bodies. But now I am out of that zone. I know I can control it & I can wait. I might even be able to saturate it within myself until my death if time demands.   Now, my experiments have turned more psychological in nature. Y...

Before leaving Delhi from ISBT now, in the last 40 hours, I have slipped into several long-term free-flowing conversations with primarily 2 friends of mine - one of my ex-roomies and a newly happened JNUite friend. One went about 3-4 hrs long. Fairly existential stuff.. crossing boundaries of disciplines with absolute flexibility. Almost unbelievable!  AS and I started with the conditions back home, how the career-playing-field has changed for us, getting married, etc., but soon slipped into Artificial General Intelligence (AGI), weed, psychedelics in general, our association with ISKCON and inevitably discussed Open Eyed Meditation and the so-called Mindfulness. The illusion  of free will again became a crucial friction point between us.  I admit I pushed it on AS way harder than optimal. I generally do that with Physics people since they are better positioned to address this question head-on. Kharbanda, if she is reading this, can relate to this, "Umm.. yeah...

Credit: Akiyoshi Kitaoka  Black columns appear to expand. But they aren't.  Segments are horizontal but they appear to be tilted.  Both the masks/helmets are of same angular size but the upper one appear to be bigger. It's not though.  You 'red-ish' part in the eye? It's actually grey.  The letters look tilted? They aren't.  Nothing is moving here, you cousin of apes! These are perfect circles! Not distorted curves.  Again, nothing is moving here, except your head.  You see? That yellow part? No, it's just white+ black strips.  It is moving, right? No.  Scroll up & down. U will see something. But, it's just an illusion.  VKJ)

Is Buri Nazar a thing? (asked on Quora) In my understanding, it's a classic example of superstition / psychological illusion. And the process to avoid/ 'cure’ it, call it nimbu-mirchi /nazar-battu/ Drishti/ Kannu / Dishti is a widespread pseudoscience. (pic: performing Drishti, a South Indian ritual) You are almost waiting for an unwanted thing to happen & blame your 'evil’ neighbour for it. Nothing, absolutely nothing happens when someone looks at you, except photons scattering off your cheeks and entering their pupil. VKJ (twitter): common superstitions here Evil Eye is almost a cultural universal. Evil Eye (across the globe)

          The bus (Salasar Darbar, I couldn't find its picture) departed from Taranagar, the city where I pursued my Senior Secondary. I had just emptied my bladder, so I wasn't expecting any urine problems until the next city, Sardarshahar.          (I forgot to mention. I was going to Pokhran, Jaisalmer, where my sister is posted as a primary teacher in a nearby rural school. Her flatmate had gone home. My bhanja is just 2 yrs old.)         But I was wrong. Within minutes, I could feel the pressure again building up in my bladder. "I just peed. It's beyond comprehension!" I laughed. My rational mind had already projected, "You can't make it to Sardarshahar, boy. It is at least an hour away. Better to ask the guy to stop the bus for you at the next village or so and release it." Another bunch of neurons jumped in, "Come on, Vinoda, don't fall for such nonsense. You just peed 5 minutes ...

During my BSc days at DU, for about 14-15 months, I was part of something called Vedic Club, later Shreshtha Club, a Delhi-based group of the Bhagwad Gita scholars and boys interested in the same. The motive, roughly, was to revive the practical wisdom of ancient Indian scriptures among the youth. Later, I learned this was just a small branch of a larger vision called the International Society for Krishna Consciousness (ISKCON). Positives : The Hare Krishna chanting and dance I danced many times on Sounds, such as Baarat, farewell, etc. Although I, for practical purposes, wasn't a devotee, these chants brought out the most insane dances in me — the free-flowing dance - dancing with almost strangers with no calculations in my head. Our trip to Harsil Valley and Gangotri was deeply fulfilling and psychologically enriching. Needless to say, it was relatively cheap, too. Negatives: “Sri Krishna is the supreme personality of Godhead." This is where everything theoretica...

 This one is important. Lemme pen it down before life goes busy again.  (Names changed in the narration for obvious reasons.) Today, I accompanied my mausa ji (my sister's sasur) for his visit to XYZ Heart Hospital, Sirsa. He has been suffering from pain-in-chest issues. Today, his angiography (an X-ray after injecting a special dye into the blood vessels) was supposed to happen. Turned out they were going by a relative's car, and I joined them at Malsisar. The relative (our driver), Badri Nath, was to visit UVW Hospital for the diagnosis of her wife, Manju, who had been suffering from continuous rounds of fever for the last 20 days. On the way, I went through past diagnoses and reports of my mausa ji. The Jaipur report said, " sinus bradycardia" . Roughly "slow heartbeat". I couldn't go deeper. I had no time to bother about Manju's reports. We reached and parted our ways. Dr. X first made Mausaji undergo a blood test to ensure he was fit for angiog...

I enjoy writing such insignificant things and the fact that poor English doesn't bother me anymore.  Yesternight, sleeping in our Chobara on the roof, I was fighting the fever (the one that's almost inevitable after vaccinated with Covishield) without paracetamol, thinking this is the best time to practice mindfulness using pain as the object of concentration.  It's quite calm everywhere except that low sound symphony of insects. Suddenly, nearby, I hear a little louder sound, something like that of a kangan / paajeb of a lady walking. And your VKJ- a strong adherent of modern science and rationality couldn't skip the first thought of possibility of a  bhootni or daakin approaching me with evil intentions. I laughed on the thought and paid closer attention to the sound, thinking of possibility of some night creature... afterall Jyani u have heard exotic sound symphony of birds at the dawn, why can't insects, birds and other creatures come active at midnight...The so...

I am yet to find an optimal way of estimating how much one should regret on the time he 'wastes' a day.  You don't waste much time on daily basis? Sachchi? Like snacking on social media, YouTube for 2 minutes (of course it gets elongated to half an hour) or arguing with your taau on how dumb & superstitious most people around you often are...or  thinking about how beautiful you looked in that pic 4 yrs ago...or re-reading that insignificant wtsp chat with a stranger that has 0.0001 probability of encountering you again in future.. Or reading this nonsense on my blog? Is it a 'total waste'? No, it's the process from which the new ideas, imaginations, plans & dreams emerge. From this random purposeless 'snacking'. But as far as your near future-goal/ plan / determination is concerned it's almost a total waste.  I am in 02550, hoping to reach Kamakhya within 5 hrs, to complete my last 3.5 months of master of physics at IITG.  New Jal...

Hundreds and thousands of living beings meet death at every moment, yet the foolish man thinks himself deathless and does not prepare for death. This is the biggest wonder of life. (-Death: An Inside Story) The fear is simply because you are not living with life, You are living in your mind. (- Mystic's Musings) You have come here to avoid life or to experience it? - Death : An inside story The most beautiful moments in life are moments when you are expressing your joy, not when you are seeking it. Sex in the body is fine. Money in the wallet is fine. It is only a problem when they enter your mind. If your body goes in search of a relationship, we call this sexuality. If your mind goes in search of relationships, we call this companionship. If your emotion goes in search of relationships, we call this love. If your energies go in search of relationship, we call this yoga. (-Life and Death in One Breath ) If you think hundred percent logically, there is really no possibility of li...

You are in a real hurry for whatever reason. But you also gotta pee. You walk towards the place. And in a hurry, you're taking the thing out & something down there hurts. Sucks like nothing else. Got it? No... Sometimes, some live pubic hair ( a bit longer ones) get trapped under your foreskin (s omehow) & they rest there in the contracted state of the system. Now, you're taking the system out in haste. And these thin threads of keratin ( hair) rub against your softness. It should hurt…. & It does. You realize this within milliseconds and then slide the entire foreskin backward & liberate the poor guys. Only now can you release the chemicals. And all this jaddojahad takes 2 seconds extra…which you definitely don't like. One more thing that sucks about being born like this is you need to adjust the thing in different orientations at different instants of time, especially when u sit in one posture for long hrs. At any time, it can say, “Let me rest on the lef...

I see myself changing my opinions about the same things many many times over the years. That's why , perhaps, I never hold strong opinions on anything. Talking to my friends, teachers here & people at the village I see the following ones as somewhat unpopular. Will try to add more when comes to mind. • I used to believe, human sex too has very little to do with emotional & psychological side of the being like any other mammal. It's fundamentally just physical. Most people are just under cultural/ social pressure when they don't admit pure anamalistic/ wild nature of human sexual desire.  But no, my opinions have changed. I don't think you can divorce the sexual encounters from the humanity, emotions and feelings of your partner. He/she isn't like a sweet that your tongue can have taste of whichever way you like. There comes the 'humane' part of our seemingly anamalistic sexuality. Your sexual partner (given that he/she has gone intimate with you to t...

This one is about the brokers & flat owners there. Summers 2018. Meetesh and I needed a place to stay during summer vacations as we had joined a coaching for JAM. Our PG closed its mess until 19th July and was charging much higher for the damn June & July. We decided to go for a flat or a room thinking we could manage with tiffin food. Ended up talking to a nearby broker. Neither liked the room that he showed nor agreed on the monthly rent. He offered with 1 or 2 more options. I politely disagreed each time, “ Nhi Lena sir , itna mahanga.” Now suddenly, this guy offered ( atleast in 'talk') me a room in his own house at Model Town at much cheaper monthly rent, food and also promised to drop me at coaching in GTB Nagar daily! And it was becoming difficult to stop him. First I was puzzled. Then I got a glimpse of my future with him & a picture emerged. So this was it. This could have become the darkest side of Delhi in my graduation . I found myself somewhat angry aft...

Not an expert but answering to the best of my knowledge, experience and understanding. ( So correct me.) Most men who believe they ejaculate premature, aren't suffering from clinical premature ejaculation . Yes, if you last one minute+, it's not premature ejaculation and can easily be extended upto 10+ minutes or even an hour by little bit of psychological training and lo wering the excitement level. Give up the idea ( and the parallel imagination) that things should go the way they go in porn. Coz porn is a fake world but you are real , your penis is real ( just check!). Do you drink water imagining how beautifully somebody else drank special kind of water in style from a golden glass on the other day (in a movie)? No. When you are thirsty and water is available, you just drink it gracefully. For the pleasure of it, you don't drink it too fast for it might spill all over or go down your arteria to chock the respiratory inlet. Body has enough inbuilt understanding ...